Daily Archives: July 19th, 2008

Please Don’t Vote for a Democrat: an ad that was borne from months of focus group research, market-based analysis, consultation with political figu…nah, I’m just shittin’ ya.  Some redneck wrote a song, paid a lot of money, and threw the image of the Twin Towers and Old Glory up on three billboards to promote his website.  This is at the least tasteless and at the most horribly offensive.  It not only seeks to exploit fear and rage over terrorism, but it appears to label Democrats as the perpetrators of 9/11.  Well, guess what: no one could have stopped 9/11 from happening; but the War in Iraq started in a Republican administration, was terribly prosecuted by Republican ideologues, and may have to be won in a Democratic administration.  Would the billboard’s creator, Mike Meehan, make such a tacky and desparate attempt for support if the Republicans had a prayer of winning back the trust of the American people?

Now, I can tell what you are thinking: “I know the Democrats are baby-killing flag burners, but is there any way I can communicate that message to my kids, whom I love almost as much as I love my guns, my SUV, and my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ?” Well, sit the little bastards down in front of the screen, because Meehan has composed a helpful paean against the vices of so-called “liberalism” and so-called “equality” and so-called “respect for the planet and those people of other cultures and races.”

http://www.therepublicansong.com/watch.html

Let’s see how the video checks out on the list of Conservative Whore-Objects:

Farm………………………………….

Flag…………………………………

Whitey (no one darker than khaki)…

Dog…………………………………….

John Deere………………………….

NASCAR hat……………………….…

Cowboy boots………………………

God/soldier reference………………

Flag as attire……………..…………

Military uniform……………………

Reagan and Jesus eating apple pie….X

            Nearly a perfect score.  Doesn’t it just melt your heart when the guy on the tractor looks adoringly up at his flag?  Or when he wears it while playing the guitar?  Or when he holds his CD up against its silhouette, implying that his product and the universal symbol of freedom are one in the same?  He actually appeared on Fox News wearing the same flag outfit:

            By the way, did you notice in the video that the only time when your screen was not completely inundated by red, white, and blue and/or subliminal graphics of the flag itself was while the Democrat was talking?  Fairness and balance aside, where does this guy get off physically wearing the Stars and Stripes?  When was the last time you saw a true American patriot—George Washington, Thomas Paine, Ben Franklin, James Madison, Abraham Lincoln—wearing a suit made out of the flag?  Listen, patriotism is not something to be whored out of a JC Penny’s catalogue; it results from dedication to helping your own people, working on behalf of your country to better the world, serving as an officeholder/voter/juror/soldier, and giving your children a better life.  The men above fit into each of those categories; Meehan seems to think that patriotism can be produced, sold, and bought on the free market just like his precious oil.  I am sure that if we drill around inside his heart long enough, we can find ample wells of patriotism; but for now he chooses to behave like an unequivocal, unilateral, demagogic douche.

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